Monday, August 8, 2011

Ten reasons why zombies make better boyfriends

Ok so maybe zombies are really slow, super retarded hence the high probability they will forget to pick you up from somewhere and yes on the hotness scale they are in the negatives but that doesn't mean they wouldn't make great boyfriends and these are my reasons why:

10. You will NEVER have to worry about any shady woman trying to get your man! He will be yours and yours only.

9. If he stares at other woman you will never have to worry that it's because he is checking them out but rather the fact that he finds them delectable and would love to tear their limbs. Hey better her than you right?!

8. He will NEVER interrupt you when you go on and on talking about how your day was or what a biatch a fellow co-worker is, instead he will just stare and listen mostly because he doesn't have the brain capacity to reply but hey every woman wants an empty vessel to vent to.

7. Your parents will approve of him 100% (mostly out of fear of being eaten if they disagree)

6.If you ever have an argument with him he will never talk back and will always agree with what you have to say (like i said dude doesn't have too many brain cells so he can't)

5. He will always dress in the way you like your boyfriends to be dressed, well mostly because you will have to dress him but that means you have complete stylist control and I'm sure every woman has a mini Rachel Zoe in them :)
Aint nothing sexier than your boo in a suit! ;)

4. He is not too overprotective only when other zombies are around.

3. Since he doesn't have the cognitive ability to disagree with you this means you will have COMPLETE remote-control control! So you and your booboo can watch all the episodes of Desperate Housewives without a tad bit of complaining from your significant other.

2. You won't have to constantly worry about trying to impress him with the way you dress and look because i mean really look at him it doesn't take that much to impress a guy like this:

1. Lastly ladies you will finally have a man who truly loves you more for your brains rather than superficial things like your body and that i know for sure is every woman's wish and desire!


  1. Cute post. :) I've been out with a few guys who fit the description above, and it was actually pretty boring! I need someone to talk at some point...

    Your blog post is reminding me of something bizarre I read about in another blog:

    I guess there's a magazine for everyone!

  2. wow that magazine is prob the most disturbing i have seen in a while!! firstly who on earth came up with the concept and secondly who buys this? i wud pay to jst see the expression on the tillers face when someone puts it down on the counter and wants to buy it! hahahaha

  3. Yeah, I'm not even sure that's real! Although, some people are into strange things...I wonder where this would even be available for purchase! I'm sure that you won't find it on the shelves of Barnes and Noble. :) I would think it's only available in dirty shops or online. There would probably be a little shame involved with that purchase!

    What I'm curious about is where they find the women to model for this and how much they get paid! Not like lounging around on a plastic skeleton while wearing a bikini takes a lot of work...

  4. Hahaha something just popped in my head, imagine a guy who is into that kind of thing and breaks up with girl saying " Hey babe i dnt think this is gnna work out for us, you i jst dnt thnk your dead enough for me! my like my girls rotting with maggots coming out of their eyes and your just too full of life!" LMAO

    I think with a magazine like that they prob want it delivered in the mail you knw to escape the shame lol and yea true true i mean i guess if you need the money that bad you will do about anything haha

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  6. Oops - I just noticed a few spelling errors and deleted that first comment...

    Ha! Yeah, that would be a good break up line, because the other person wouldn't try to argue with you. They'd assume you were insane and say "Umm...Yeah, let's just be friends." :)

    I'm assuming (and hoping) that the magazine doesn't have a huge readership. So, a person probably gets paid like $10 to model for it! Well, if it is delivered in the mail, I can only imagine what the postal workers think of the people they're delivering it to...

  7. Hahaha ok but imagine explaining that to your friends much less your parents when they find out thats the "modeling" job u were talking about lol

    I guess the craziness never stops :P

  8. Lol. I loved this post, it made me giggle! Nothing is more sexier than your zombie boo in a suit! ^_^

  9. Hahahah wat can i say im a lil crazy lol am happy i made u laugh :)

  10. LULZ! What a great post! Totally cracked me up!

  11. Hahahah Thanks am stoked you liked it!! :D